We love a Red Rock moment, especially when there’s bridal beauty involved! This gallery from our friends down in Arizona captures all the desert deliciousness we love most.
Sophia and Truman were craving a bit of adventure following their Arizona wedding celebration. So in true desert-lover fashion, they packed up their wedding attire and set out to find an epic backdrop for some unforgettable bridals. Sophia, the blushing bride, grew up near Page, AZ and spent her childhood years exploring the landscapes of southern Utah and northern Arizona. She wanted images captured in a place that captured her and her husband’s love for the land.
The pair enlisted photographer Sammie Photo to join them on their quest, and embarked on a full-day, off-roading journey to find the perfect spot. They finally landed among these breathtaking cliffs at White Pocket, taking advantage of the swirling forms at sunset for truly magical galleries they will cherish for years to come.
When it comes to planning weddings, couples usually (and rightfully so) get lost in the bigger picture. They’re thinking about how they want the day to feel, how they’ll want to remember their wedding, and even how their guests enjoy the experience.
And honestly? I can’t blame them. Those are all exciting, beautiful things they should focus on, and it’s always my hope that a couple gets blissfully caught up in what their dream wedding looks and feels like.
The only issue with that is that the big picture takes priority, and the details–especially important ones–sometimes take a backseat. One of those important details that often gets lost in the mix?
Choosing the right officiant for their ceremony.
As a wedding planner, I’m well acquainted with the moving parts and intricacies of planning a wedding. After nearly a decade of experience, I’ve learned that one of the elements that can make or break a perfect-fit wedding ceremony is choosing the right officiant.
But with so many options out there, how can you even begin to know how to pick the right person to officiate your wedding?
I’ve got plenty of tips and lots of experience in this department, so in this blog, I’ll be sharing every detail I’ve got up my sleeve for choosing the perfect-fit officiant for your special day.
What is as a Wedding Officiant?
First things first, let’s get a little foundational education out of the way. I’ve often found that couples don’t usually know who qualifies as a wedding officiant.
Most think that officiants have to be religious figures–pastors, rabbis, priests, etc. And while these individuals are typically ordained to lead and legally wed couples, they’re not the only people out there who qualify as officiants.
A wedding officiant is a person who performs the ceremony, signs your marriage license, and, in most states, legally marries a couple.
A wedding officiant can be anyone who is legally permitted to perform a marriage ceremony. So, yes, a priest or a rabbi can be an officiant, but anyone who’s legally ordained can technically perform a ceremony and sign on the “officiant” line of your marriage license.
Though every officiant is a little different, most often, though they write and perform your ceremony. A great officiant will know how to write a beautiful ceremony script that aligns with your vision of an ideal wedding ceremony.
In most states, couples are required to have a wedding officiant for their ceremony to be legal–but this isn’t true in every state. For example, in Colorado, couples can self-solemnize–this means that neither officiants nor witnesses are required for their ceremony to be legal.
That being said, even when officiants aren’t required, they’re still a staple in most ceremonies because they help guide the couple through their ceremony in a natural, meaningful way.
Tips for Choosing the Right Officiant for Your Wedding Day
There are so many unique officiants out there that can offer you a variety of strengths, but ultimately, the main goal is to choose an officiant that matches a couple’s personality, understands their goals, and fits right into their experience.
As a planner, I’m always looking for new ways to vet officiants to ensure they’ll be the right fit for a specific couple–when the vibe is right, a couple’s vision of their perfect wedding day can truly come to life.
Here are a few of my tried and true tips for choosing an ideal officiant for your wedding day.
Interview More Than One Candidate
To me, it’s best practice to choose a few different officiants to interview. While it’s totally possible you could find a stellar officiant on the first interview, it never hurts to scan your options and see who is out there. Usually, I choose two or three candidates that might be the right fit, then let my couples interview them and select the officiant that works best for them.
Book Ahead of Time
Often, officiant selection gets overlooked–and that can leave the couple scrambling to find whoever might be available. Truthfully, I think officiant selection should happen anywhere between nine months to one year before your wedding so you can really get a feel for who is right for you. This gives you plenty of time to find–and choose–an officiant that makes your wedding dreams come true.
Take Notes During the Interview
If you, as the couple, plan to lead the interview, make sure you’re feeling out a few things about the officiant. Consider factors like:
Do your personalities work well together?
Is it easy and natural to communicate with this officiant?
Do they seem honest and transparent about their process?
Are they professional–online and in person?
Do you feel like you could trust them to do the best job?
Are they a good storyteller?
Can they hold interest?
Consider Professionals But Don’t Overlook Personal Ones
Yes, there are infinite possibilities for professional officiants out there–and lots of them would be fantastic choices for your ceremony. But just because a pro could do the job doesn’t mean someone close to you couldn’t do it just as well–if not better!
The professional vs. personal debate is always a tough one for couples. On one hand, if they choose a professional, their loved ones can sit back, relax, and enjoy their wedding. On the other hand, a family member or a friend knows the couple so much better–it could be more meaningful (and personal) to have them lead their ceremony.
Anyone can get ordained online–it’s easy! And to be totally honest, you don’t technically have to have your wedding officiated by an ordained minister if you plan to “get married” at the courthouse ahead of time or after your wedding. If you’d like to have someone you love wed you and your future spouse, but you don’t have time to get them ordained, this could be a seamless way to make that happen.
(Just remember–you do have to take care of it at the courthouse, or else you won’t be legally married!)
Having someone leading your ceremony that has a deeper connection to you can be incredibly special. A potential downside in this scenario is that it’s likely you’ll have to take a more active role in writing the ceremony. If you already planned on being hands-on in the process, though, this could be a meaningful way to experience your ceremony.
Wedding Planner Pro Tip: If you do plan on asking a friend or family member to officiate your ceremony, consider checking out tools like Provenance for help writing and creating ceremony scripts.
Check Their Status
If you’re opting for a professional officiant, you’ll want to make sure they’re legally ordained before you hire them. Take a peek at the list of registered officiants on your county’s website to ensure they’re a good pick.
Lean on a Planner to Help Get all the Details
Don’t be afraid to rely on your planner to help you with the whole process. Share a list of questions with them that you want them to ask–and you can even have them guide the interview if you’d like.
Consider questions like these:
Are you available on my date and location?
Can you sign a marriage certificate in the state of Utah?
How long have you been officiating weddings? How many have you done?
What kinds of ceremonies have you performed in the past?
Why did you start doing this?
How many weddings do you officiant on average per year?
What is your process of creating a ceremony script?
Will you help me obtain a marriage license or at least tell me what to do?
Where can I find reviews, or can I please have a past client to call as a referral?
Do you help with vows?
Have you worked with my planner before?
How much are your services, and what exactly do they include?
Are you available for our ceremony rehearsal?
Are you inclusive of all types of religious, non-religious, LLGBTQIA+, and civil weddings?
What time on the wedding day will you arrive?
What is the average time of a ceremony you usually perform?
What will you typically wear to perform the ceremony?
Do you have any requests or requirements to perform this ceremony?
When will we see the first draft of the ceremony script, and how far in advance of the wedding will we receive the final?
If you are unable to attend our wedding due to illness and such – do you have a replacement plan?
What do I need to bring to the ceremony? What will you bring?
What do you read the ceremony script from? Book? iPad? Paper?
How do you handle the logistics of the marriage license post-wedding?
Are you able to customize our ceremony based on our request?
What to Know About Marriage Licenses in Utah
Every state is different–every county is, too. I suggest applying for your marriage license through Utah County–even if you’re getting married in a different county in the state. In Utah County, your license can be completed online. They will email you several PDF’s that you will forward to the officiant and wedding planner.
Once you’re married, you will immediately receive a legal digital copy of your license via email, followed with a hard copy the county clerk will mail–all for the low cost of $50.
The Ultimate Hack for Choosing a Great Officiant: Picking a Great Wedding Planner
At the end of the day, the best thing you can do for your officiant picking process (and to be honest, your entire wedding planning process) is choose a wedding planner that understands your vision. At Irene + CO Events, we’re always ready to help our couples find their right officiants–I’m sure your wedding planner will be, too!
First impressions happen once. If your goal is to create a lasting impact on your wedding day, it’s important to focus on the technical details such as lighting and sound equipment.
No one wants their important moments interrupted by a screeching microphone that wasn’t set up in the right place or a piece of equipment falling because it wasn’t mounted properly. Working with top industry professionals like Skylark Productions will allow you to focus on making memories rather than fussing with complicated equipment.
Skylark is Utah’s premiere AV company with an outstanding reputation for quality and professional services. As a partner business of Utah Live Bands, Skylark offers innovative and creative services that turn standard events into magical experiences.
Focused on continually expanding their offerings, they are constantly building their inventory of staging and lighting elements. By incorporating the latest technology and most state-of-the-art equipment, they aim to bring their client’s vision to life that exceeds all expectations.
“Our goal is to be the obvious resource for clients who want something uniquely theirs and is worthy of their high standards,” explains owner, Michael Tobian.
Skylark discovered early on from their clients just how hard it is to find a team of experts to run lighting and AV equipment, so they’ve designed their business model around customer satisfaction.
“We want to spend time getting the sound and equipment perfect, providing the extra effort and expense to make the final experience breathtaking. We are the top experts in our field and our team is the very best and most experienced.”
Michael Tobian, Owner
Ask the Expert
What’s Ahead:
We are constantly pushing our offerings in terms of innovation and creativity, but also in the scope of our services. We have really built an inventory of resources that allows us to do things that nobody else can. Some of the most fun conversations we have with our clients are when we learn about their weddings and come up with one exciting idea after another. It might deal with lighting, decor, guest experiences, etc.
Excited About:
The clients we get to spend time with, discussing the design, look, and feel of their event and then custom building the design to their preferences. We love adding creative and innovative elements not seen at other events.
Fresh Ideas:
We love a challenge! We once created a lightning storm simulation right inside the venue for a client! We’ve turned ballrooms into winter wonderlands, executed cirque floor shows during dinner, made custom stage facades, backdrops, and bar fronts, live-streamed entire wedding ceremonies and receptions with multiple cameras for family members unable to make it and more. If you need ideas, call us and we’ll be happy to chat. Even if you don’t end up hiring us, let’s brainstorm about how to make your event fun and unique!
Office manager, Elle, and table games dealer, Tad, began their love story in a local bar in their hometown of Spokane, Wash. in February 2017. After a four-year love story, Tad popped the question in Las Vegas. Tad planned to take a photo with his future bride in front of the Love Sign inside the Venetian Resort, the same spot that their first photo as a couple was taken. The newly-engaged couple were greeted with applause and their wedding planning journey began.
THE WEDDING:
After a three year engagement, the wedding morning began with a sign from the universe: an eclipse. Wedding guests and party members were able to witness the astronomical event before witnessing another.
The Washington-based couple ventured away from home for their Red Rocks wedding. Ellee and Tad selected the scenic Sunset Grill in Moab as their wedding venue.
“We visit Moab yearly to go camping and Sunset Grill is one of the restaurants we like to visit right before we leave,” Ellee said.
The black and white wedding showed off the couples’s love for neutral colors, as well as enhanced the cowboy-western appeal of the experience. The couple opted for neutrals in order to not overwhelm the wedding with too much color, so the focus of the event could be the happy couple and to highlight the scenic red rocks background.
Ellee walked down the aisle in designer Alena Lena’s “Armeria” dress. The fluffy-tulle dress with off-the-shoulder long sleeves complimented the bridal look. Ellee’s remarkable black veil and black and white hair color complimented the wedding colors, as well as the beautiful scenery of the wedding.
Tad donned an off-white suit jacket with complimentary black pants and all-black Vans shoes to match the color scheme. The groom included a photo of his father, to honor and include him in the wedding after his passing in 2016.
Ellee was accompanied by her bridesmaids, her two younger sisters, her best friend and her sister-in-law while Tad’s three best friends took their place by his side as the couple tied the knot. The bridesmaids stunned in their black dresses of various styles while the groomsmen sported black tuxes.
The wedding ceremony commenced as Ellee was walked down the aisle by the couple’s three-year-old and concluded with the newlyweds sealing the deal with a romantic kiss next to the red rocks and unique southern Utah landscape.
THE PARTY:
Ellee and Tad started their marriage off with a bang. After officially tying the knot, the newly married couple celebrated with a shot. The reception, also held and catered by Sunset Grill, featured a menu of fettuccini alfredo, pasta and salad. Signature drinks of the night included Ellee’s Jalepeño Margarita and Tad’s Jameson mule. The venue also provided a house sunset lemonade for the wedding.
The wedding cake, made by Sugar Shaker Bakery, was a decadent chocolate cake with a sweet raspberry filling. The one-tier, heart-shaped cake took on a vintage look with its black and white frosting with “Married AF” written in cursive frosting.
The couple’s guest book was an acoustic guitar signed by the guests. The decor for the event included string lights, a black sign with the new couple’s last name in neon letters and a black Jenga tower.
Ellee’s Alena Leena flowy dress was switched out for a sleek and more danceable gown from Meshki, a black leather jacket and a pair of black cowboy boots to show off her western side. A violinist played music during the cocktail hour while the reception was “DJed” by a speaker and a playlist.
The couple’s first dance was to “I Think I’m in Love with You” by Chris Stapleton. The groom also performed his own special version of the iconic early 2000s song “Ignition” as a gift to the bride.
When he was ten years old, Kade was part of a little league team. Little did he know that the sister of one of his teammates and the daughter of his coach, eight-year-old Olivia, who was sitting in the stands would be the love of his life and his bride over ten years later.
“He played second base and my Dad described him as ‘coachable, responsive, hardworking and respectful, even as a 10-year-old kid.’ I wasn’t the biggest fan of watching him play back then, but watching him play sports now is one of my favorite things to do,” Olivia said.
After over ten years of knowing each other and seven months of dating the two are ready to finally tie the knot.
Since their love story began with parks and childhood, Kade took it back to their roots for his intricate proposal. The groom planned a scavenger hunt around the couple’s hometown where he took her to places significant to her, their relationship and their childhoods. At each stop, Kade left a love note for Olivia. In the end, Olivia found her beau in a sentimental park where she was greeted with a bouquet of roses, glimmering lights and a sign that read “marry me.”
The young couple took their dazzling winter bridal photos outside of La Caille in Sandy. The groom’s plaid dark forest green suit jacket paired with Olivia’s wintery floral arrangement and form-fitting lacy wedding dress paired well with their wintery photo shoot.
“I wanted our outfits to be appropriate for the time of year, especially getting married so close to Christmas,” Olivia said. “I thought that his sport coat was fitting for the occasion, it was unique, and a classic look. It complimented my dress perfectly, and fit Kade so well.”
The bride’s dress included a mock neck, and intricate art deco-style lace from head to toe. The mermaid-esque gown was only the second dress the blushing bride tried on and it was love at first sight. It was classy but unique and the neutral-toned lining made the dress’s distinctive lace stand out even more.
When it comes to choosing the right floral designer, it’s rare you’ll find a company with more expertise or passion for floral design than Every Blooming Thing.
After 40+ years in business, owner Robert Upwall and his team of experts are who you’ll want in your corner when you’re ready to begin selecting the beautiful elements for your wedding day.
Nothing demands elegance more in a room than when it’s enhanced with gorgeous blooms and greenery. Choosing the right team with a proven reputation you can trust like EBT is essential to brighten up the memorable events in your life.
“We are grateful and proud to say that we have done weddings for families spanning three generations. We aren’t just a one stop destination. We are there for anniversaries, baby showers, dances, first dates and proposals,” remarks Store Director, Crystal Tatton.
EBT understands the importance of focusing on the unique qualities, personalities and vision of their couples, embracing what is true and original, so they can capture the essential details of their dream wedding.
When you’re ready to work with the best in the industry to bring your fairytale to life, reach out to the team at Every Blooming Thing and learn why they’ve held a top spot in the wedding industry for over four decades.
Crystal Tatton, Store DirectorRobert Upwall, Owner
“We fall in love not only with the details of what we do but with the originality of those we do it for; we’re here for the forever journey.”
Robert Upwall
Ask the Expert
What’s Ahead:
Textural flowers have made their way into weddings and are not leaving any time soon. We’re looking forward to bold pops of color!
Excited About:
Couples who come with excitement, ideas and inspiration, trusting us to take the vision they’ve dreamt up and turn it into a beautiful reality. We want you to enjoy this time, especially on your big day!
Fresh Ideas:
A signature of ours is the blending of styles. Industrial boho, organic glam or a classic style with touches of vintage. Our designs are also architectural and filled with texture, drawing visual interest.
Love birds Dallin and Maddie met on popular LDS dating app Mutual. For Dallin, love at first sight meant chasing after Maddie for a few months before her eventual departure for an 18-month LDS mission. Nevertheless, Dallin stayed strong and love led to these beautiful scenic bridal photos.
The young couple celebrated their nuptials by taking these bridal photos at the scenic red rocks that Southern Utah has to offer. Dallin is dressed in a grey suit with a pink tie from Utah’s iconic Mr. Mac men’s suit clothiers. Maddie is dressed in a flowy, tulle puff-sleeved wedding gown from Moments Made Bridal in Bluffdale. Her floral bouquet was arranged by Wilson Park Floral and the dusty orange color of the flowers matches the scenery perfectly.
The couple’s scenic backdrop combined with Hayden and Megan Photography’s photography skills led to a beautiful bridal photoshoot showcasing the “high” the couple feels toward their upcoming wedding.
Old Hollywood meets modern glamour in Madison & Tom’s intimate downtown elopement.
THE COUPLE
Madison and Thomas first met at a housewarming party at Madison’s Provo apartment. Through mutual friends, the pair connected and immediately hit it off. Three years later, in preparation for a move to California, the couple tied the knot in a spontaneous and intimate elopement at the Grand America Hotel in downtown Salt Lake City.
A few weeks before their ceremony, the couple chose a ring together and began planning their vows. First up? The venue.
“I initially wanted to elope in a beautiful park, but being March/April in Utah, we couldn’t bet on good weather,” says Madison. “The Grand America is beautiful, romantic and very vintage-esque. As soon as I saw photos of the balcony, I immediately knew that was the spot.”
THE ELOPEMENT
Madison wanted their elopement to be classic, elegant, and embody all the old Hollywood vibes fellow vintage girlies know and love. Her inspiration came from a wedding playlist carefully curated over a number of years, filled with the likes of Billie Holladay, Sam Cookie, Otis Redding and Solomon Burke.
The vision began with the fashion details: her ring had a delicate pearl centerpiece rather than a diamond, and her flouncing mini dress from Lulu’s brought Old Hollywood to life with classic ribbons and bows.
“I loved that the look was simple, but with a statement,” says Madison. “Sweet and soft but also sexy.”
The bride also wore sheer gloves embroidered with pearls, and a simple white veil atop her half-pinned hairstyle and classic cat eye.
“Thomas said something along the lines of, ‘You remind me of I Love Lucy’ so I knew the look was giving exactly what i was going for.
The look was accented with a dried bouquet in shades of ivory and blush, standing out in stunning style against Tom’s simple black suspenders and bow tie.
The ceremony consisted of just pure love, encapsulated: on site were merely the couple, their officiant Zachary Pratt of Centerpoint Church, and a couple vendors to capture the special moment.
“It was wonderful to have the day truly be about us, instead of having to force ourselves to entertain other people and their ideas of what our special day should look or feel like.”
After they said “I Do,” Madison and Tom popped champagne and fed each other chocolate strawberries, celebrating their union in perfect intimacy. The pair plans to celebrate further with family and friends in a reception later this summer.
VENDORS Venue — The Grand America Hotel, thegrandamerica.com Photographer — Nathalie Saldana, capturedbynathalie.com Florist — Sadie Sunshine Floristry, sadiesunshinefloristry.com Bride’s Attire: Lulu’s, lulus.com; Amazon, amazon.com Groom’s Attire: Amazon, amazon.com HMUA: Starlee Johnson Hair, Cami Craig Makeup Videographer — Cris David
With fifteen seasons archived, Fuse Weddings and Events knows that executing the perfect wedding begins with mutual compatibility and impeccable design.
Fuse owner and renowned wedding planning expert, Mara Mazdzer, is as selective with her clientele as she is with her artistic vision. Prioritizing the value of well-suited partnerships, Mazdzer emphasizes choosing the right clientele in order to foster positive and effective experiences.
“We have a limited number of clients we work with each season, so we choose couples with visions we’re excited about and when we feel like we’re a good fit. A Fuse client knows we’re partners through the entire process with an equal investment in the success of their event,” Mazdzer explains.
Focused on unforgettable guest experiences paired with bespoke design, events with Fuse emphasize the important details of each couple to ensure they capture their unique love story.
Recurring feedback Fuse receives after events is how guests and family gushed about the authenticity of the big day and how it really “felt like” the couple they were celebrating.
When planning your perfect day, Fuse urges you to research the vendors you’re considering and read their reviews to help make your dream day a reality. “We’ve learned that working with the right people is the best formula for a successful day and the best strategy to enjoy the process.”
“We’re dedicated to our clients and take the time to learn about the details that matter most to them, allowing us to prioritize where to spend our energy and budget to turn their specific ‘wow’moments into reality.”
Mara Mazdzer, Owner
Ask the Expert:
What’s Ahead:
We’re excited to launch a partnership with another planning studio, this one focused on better serving our local clientele looking for a high-end experience without the extra services our current destination-wedding clients require.
Excited About:
“Minimalistic chic” is finally on its way out! We’re seeing more couples wanting the out-of-the-box big-moment design ideas, which are so much fun to create and bring to life!
Fresh Ideas:
While this might not be the sexiest answer, plan with your budget in mind and agree on the essential elements at the beginning. Approaching the planning process with a clear idea of where you should allocate your budget will help ensure you’re focused on the things that matter most.
After eight amazing years of planning weddings, I feel like I’ve truly seen it all.
In just under a decade, I’ve helped over 100 couples get married, and in those experiences, I’ve learned one thing–everyone wants their wedding to be as unique as their love. Why should that desire stop at a couple’s wedding party?
Modern weddings are constantly evolving in the way they honor, acknowledge, and nod to tradition. Having a wedding party–a group of people you cherish supporting you by your side on your wedding day–is a long-established and adored tradition.
Long gone are the days when only men peppered the groom’s side of the wedding party, or only one woman acted as a maid of honor. Now, there’s a modern twist on the way we think about wedding parties.
Brides and grooms are including the most important people by their side as they take the next steps in their journey together–no matter who they are and no matter how many of them there are.
That means that more couples are choosing non-traditional approaches to their wedding parties, including their best men selection.
Now, you’ll see best women in place of best men or even sometimes more than one best man to cover the best man list of duties.
Wedding Party FAQs: Common Questions About Organizing Your Wedding Party
The beautiful thing about a wedding party is that it–just like other elements of your wedding–can be a true reflection of what matters to you as a couple and as individuals. Still, there are some common questions every couple faces when learning about and arranging their loved ones in their own wedding party.
What Do You Call Your Wedding Party, Anyway?
If it was up to me, I’d always call a wedding party a wedding village. To me, the word “village” implies more inclusivity, leaving room for anyone you want in the party, whether they fit a traditional role or not. As the Wedding Village was established in ancient Roman times, a lot has changed since then.
How Many People Should Be In Your Wedding Village?
In ancient Rome, the wedding village required 10 witnesses in total–five from each side. That tradition has long since passed, though, and in my time as a planner, I’ve seen every size wedding village you can imagine.
Some couples simply choose not to have anyone in their wedding village, especially in areas where witnesses aren’t required (like in Colorado, where it’s legal to self-solemnize).
Other couples have had as many as 20 people in their wedding villages. The only requirement for selecting your wedding party? Make sure you’re building your village with loving, supportive people who are going to cheer you on, hype you up, and be a foundation for you before, during, and after your wedding day.
The Wedding Village Details: Let’s Talk Best Men
Can You Have More than One Best Man on Your Wedding Day?
In a word: Yes! The longer answer is that anything goes on your wedding day so long as you and your partner are happy with it. To give some context to those who might be wobbling on where they stand on the “two or more best men” thing, let’s explore where this tradition came from in the first place.
Originally a best man’s job was to act as the armed backup to help the groom out just in case something went down during the wedding, like the snap decision to elope, an attack on the wedding, or a bride who decides to call it off (yikes). You get the drift.
If we’re going by historical context, having two best men might actually be the smarter choice–the more backup you’ve got, the better odds you have, right? If we’re going by modern context, it’s just nice to have your two closest people sharing a title that means something special.
Either way, you win.
How Many Best Men Can You Have?
You can choose as many best men as feels right to you and your partner–there’s no wrong answer on your wedding day. As a planner, I am always sure to schedule and organize individual photos, details, and time with each member of your wedding village no matter what, so there’s no need to limit yourself from the logistics perspective of things.
Assign your wedding village based on what’s important to you. It’s your wedding, so invest in what feels uniquely you!
So, If You Choose Two Best Men–What Do You Call Them?
For people who choose to go with multiple best men, titles sometimes become a little sticky. Best men can work fine if you like the title and your two best men are actually men. Sometimes, though, other options are a must-consider.
Once, I had a couple assign each member of the wedding village a uniquely grand title, because, to them, not one person was considered the “Best Man.” For that couple, each member of their village was so much more than just a singular title, and they felt they all deserved their own.
In my time as a planner, I’ve heard a ton of different ways to refer to multiple best men, and some of my favorite inclusive options are:
Best People
Best Woman & Best Man
Friend(s) of Honor
Brother/Sister of Honor
Remember, you’re not limited to what other people have done before you. It’s your wedding and your decision–feel free to get creative with the titles.
Let’s Talk Logistics–How Do You Plan for Two Best Men During the Wedding?
From a planner’s perspective, I think the most important logistical element is to ensure the experience you have on your wedding day is the one you want to have. So, positioning your wedding village–multiple best men and all–is going to come directly from your own priorities. Here are a few options you could consider for positioning, but remember, there are no right or wrong answers here:
The Traditional Approach: Position the best man who is related to you (or closer to you) stands nearest to you, then stagger your wedding village after them
The Inclusive Approach: Reserve the front row for every member of your wedding village; have them sit there after walking you down the aisle
The Half-Circle Approach: Alternate both sides of the village in a half-circle (or even full-circle) around you
The Best Party Approach: Only include your “best people” (man and woman, man and man, woman and woman, whoever you’ve chosen) stand next to you–the rest of the village can sit in the front row
The possibilities for these logistics are endless and depend totally on your preferences, the physical space you’re working with, and what matters the most to you on your day.
How Do You Divide Up the Best Man Duties Between Multiple Best Men?
The answer is simple–play to each person’s strengths. You picked these cherished people to be your “best” for a reason, which means you value something special about each of them. The traditional duties you should be assigned to the best men are elements like:
Giving a speech
Planning the bachelor party
Assisting with picking out the wedding day attire
Helping the groom get ready on the day of
Keep track of the wedding rings
Just like other areas of life, some tasks are better when more than one person is in charge. Being able to divide up the important jobs based on their strengths can be a huge benefit to planning the day.
Can You Have Two Best Men and Only One Maid of Honor?
You absolutely can! For those who are concerned about this tilting things off balance, we’ll get this out of the way quickly–from a design perspective, yes, this would alter the balance a bit.
But ask yourself, what’s more important–a small imbalance in your wedding day photos or the satisfaction of knowing you did exactly what you wanted on your wedding day? The number one focus of your day should be feeling comfortable, happy, and totally at peace with all your decisions.
The Pros and Cons of Having Multiple Best Men
The Pros of Having More Than One Best Man
There’s a lot to consider when choosing whether or not to select more than one best man. Here are some of the key advantages to going for the multi-best man option.
Logistically (and from a planner’s perspective), it’s helpful to have more than one person in charge of keeping track of the groom before the first look to ensure it all goes smoothly.
Having more people to share their “best men toasts” is always a crowd pleaser and very sentimental for the couple
Surrounding the groom with a group of their most important people without any uncomfortableness of having to “rank” one over the others can make sure the wedding day is stress-free and seamless
Multiple best men can help gauge the environment and hype the groom up for his wedding day
Multiple best men can split the wedding tasks according to their strengths–one can handle planning the bachelor party, the other can handle organizing speeches
The Cons of Having More Than One Best Man
Every pro has a potential con in every aspect of your wedding. Here are a few other points of view to consider when it comes to choosing more than one best man.
More people in your wedding village could mean longer photo sessions–this might influence the way the timeline of your day unfolds
Multiple toasts are so fun, but they do mean more organization is necessary–you’ll have to schedule toasts instead of having sporadic ones
A modern take on the wedding village might be a tough guest for more traditional guests to understand (though, at the end of the day, only opinion matters here)
Some members of the wedding village might feel slighted (though, again, your decision is the only one that matters on your wedding day)
Choose the Best Man or Best Men Who Make Your Day Special
As a wedding planner who’s been in the industry for nearly 10 years, I can tell you first-hand that the happiest wedding days are the ones where couples lean into their vision of what a perfect day looks like–the rest of the details are just that, details.
With clear expectations, honest communication, and the willingness to get creative from a logistics perspective, having multiple best men can work out beautifully.
The most important focus of your wedding isn’t the number in your wedding village, the decor you’ve selected, or the photos you’ll take–it’s the decision to marry the love of your life exactly how you wanted.
As your wedding planner and advocate, it’s my mission to help guide you to that day every step of the way. Article Written by Irene + Co Events. For more information on planning your wedding, please visit www.irenecoevents.com.
